529 Plans, Other Tax and Financial Issues

There is so much I must recount that has happened over the last few weeks. I can't keep up with the boy. And he's a boy now, no longer a baby. But first let's start with the latest issue.

We finally looked into 529 plans. Andy actually printed the info and brought it home. I had been mentioning it over the last year, but we hadn't done anything until now. Why? Mainly because we've been slow and frankly because it's not like we're awash in extra cash we can put away. (And there are so many competing financial musts--like pay off credit card, jack up 401s and IRAs, pay down the bizzillion mortgages, etc...and now starts up college plans for Ivan.) We haven't even gotten him into daycare, which not only costs money to send the kid to, but it also costs money to be put on waiting lists. It's worse than college applications.

Anyway, Maryland has two plans -- the prepaid one, where you pay tomorrow's college tuition at today's rate but it's only for MD public schools, if I get it correctly (there is a way to use it for other schools as well, but it description was rather convoluted) and the investnment one, which basically functions like an IRA.

So which one is better? Media and financial experts seem to favor the investment one. This option gets more complicated because since each state runs its own plan, you can invest in any state's plan regardless where you live. Of course, if you invest in another state's plan, you won't profit from your state's tax breaks. I guess there are financial pros and cons to each state's plan, but who has time to figure that out, other than professional financial experts who deal in the matter.

But our tax accountant threw us (I guess, me) off course, when he suggested that the prepaid one is better. That's the one he had for his kids (although he probably has way more money than we do). So now I'm torn.....which one to pick.

The prepaid one seems more expensive, meaning that in order to paid in full the entire amount of today's college cost, the monthly (or yearly, or whatever) payments seem to steep for our current expenses. If I read the info correctly we'd have to pay over $300 monthly for 191 months (ie 17 years) to pay down today's 4-year college MD tuition. It's probably a good deal, but I really don't see how with our current finances we can swing that (especially once we send Ivan to some sort of daycare, but that's a different discussion altogether)

I'm thinking of sending my friends (with kids) an email to see whether they've started these plans and which one they chose. Unfortunately, I'm quite sure they'll all say that they have no clue but to ask their husbands. (I can do that, but it will just annoy me that they won't know and that I'm the one who's taking care of it at this end, because it's in my personality to do so). And most of the people to whom I'd pose this question are currently financially much better off than we are and I really don't want to be reminded of that.

being extra sensitive and emotional ...about baby related things..

Since Ivan was born, I've noticed that I'm extra sensitive and emotional about all things baby. Meaning every time I hear on the news that something horrible happened to a child or think about the suffering babies go through in the world, it breaks my heart. Of course, these types of horrific news are meant to do just that, but it's been worse this past year.

I've asked some other mommy friends from work, even some with older children. They all say the same. Since they've become mothers, they've become more sensitive to baby-related tragedies.

Does it ever end?

I guess it doesn't. Once a mom always a mom. But it makes me wonder, if all moms around the world feel like this, how can there be so much cruelty in the world?

up the stairs--new game

up the stairs is the new game.
but wires still rule.
as do the phones.
and the vacuum cleaner is still the best toy ever (much to Mariposa's dismay).

he's been kissing his animals.
and giving us headbuts and kisses.

mommy friend

I made my first Mommy friend in the neighborhood. I was walking Mariposa and we passed this woman and her stroller. I've been seeing her and the stroller around for as long as I've been taking Ivan out. He baby seemed the same age. So I finally stopped her and struck up a conversation. Turns out her daughter is a month younger than Ivan. They live up the street from us. She's Russian and works at the IMF. It was all too funny.

So Mariposa and I talked to them for over 1 hour. We agreed to do a play date.

I'm excited. It will be Mr. Meh's first playdate and my first Mommy friend.

While on one hand I've been so busy with work and life (ie Ivan, Andy and Mariposa) that I've barely been wanting to stay in touch with existing friends (in other words, I've really stopped caring for any pretense of social life for now. And I do sometimes fear that one day I'll find myself friendless because I've let all my friendships in the city wither away, but right now I'm content with my life as is. In other words, I've turned into a person I never understood -- the one who doesn't keep in touch)....
....I have been feeling that I need to become a bit more proactive in finding mommy friends in the neighborhoods. Why? Because everyone seems to have mommy friends and all kids eventually end up going to playdates....

I haven't really been missing this lack of mommy friends and playdates but I feel that unless I start making some new social contacts and circles that I'll start to feel its absence sooner or later.

New food choices

-prefers chunky to baby food
-prefers to be fed with a fork (an adult fork)
-prefers to eat what he seems me eat
-last week he got spinach and chicken, our leftover, ahd he loved it. ahtought i feared that spinach would be too salty.
-he's been eating sandwiches for the last few weeks (ie pieces of bread and cheese

Vacances Chez Grandma

Mr. Meh went for his first one-night sleep over at grandma's two weeks ago. It went well. I took him there in early afternoon. He crawled and explored everything. It was probably nicer than at home -- at least there was no dog hair and there is wall-to-wall carpeting. And my parents have a plethora of chachkis (don't know how to spell this) for Mr. Meh to get in trouble with.

The coffee table is made of glass. On it are porcelain candle sticks with candles in them and two big porcelain bowls. Under the table, there was a dozen or so little class teacandle holders. Next to the table on the floor are a few house plants. There are also some 100 CDs on the floor, nicely arranged. Mr. Me, of course, was fascinated with all of them. He kept taking the tea candle holders and trying to put one on top of the other. He likes to join and take things apart. Not a big deal. I know what he's trying to achieve cognitively. I can see him think. Except he's not really aware of his strength, nor is he aware that some things (like those made out of glass) should be handled gently with care.

Then he decided to play with candlesticks. He kept pulling the candles out and trying to put them back in the candlestick, which of course didn't work. Then he proceeded to put the candles in the glass bowl that was on the table. This game took a big portion of the afternoon.

I was getting upset with my dad because I was trying to move everything out of his reach, while he was telling that I need to keep a better watch on the baby. (At our house, however, he always comments that we need to move all sort of things, like the plants that spend the winter indoors, out of the baby's way).

Then I left, and Mr. Meh stayed for the night. It went well. He liked the crib they got for him. It's a big white crib, quite different from the one at home. He didn't mind sleeping there at all. Wasn't fussy at all. My mom put some toys for him in the crib, so he likes to look at them and talk to them (I'm always curious what he tells them)

So this experiment from two weeks ago went so well that on Sunday day, my parents picked up Mr. Meh and took him again to spend a few days with them. Basically, my dad was expecting some deliveries and it was easier for him to take care of Ivan at their house than here. Then they called this evening, if they can bring him back on Wednesday morning instead of tomorrow. We said fine. Ivan seems to have a good time there. He's been crawling everywhere. Playing with the phone (the transparent green landline phone) for over an hour.

He aparently also learned how to get off the bed today. When my parents put him on their big bed, he'd crawl to the edge, look over then turn around and go down feet first. I can't wait to see that.

On the home front, we miss him. It's been oddly quiet. Both of us got lots of sleep last night -- we both went to bed at nine. I should've done the same thing tonight, but instead I'm writing.

I also stayed at work late, as in my pre-Mr. Meh days. I got caught up on some work that's been lingering around. It was weird being the last one to leave. I definitely don't miss that.

Mr. Meh's health

Since the nebulizing treatment a week ago, Mr. Meh has been doing well. His nose was still snotty (but not as bad as it could've been) and he was still coughing and sneezing here and there, but otherwise he seems quite well.

On the hand, Andy got a second bout of cold over the weekend, as did my parents. So now, while Mr. Meh and I are healthy I fear that we'll get the second cold round as well.

Hope not.

Bras

Since nursing is a history by now, this would be a good time to go and buy some non-blah, non-beige, normal bras. I tried a few old bras I kept before getting pregnant, and although I fit into them (the extra fat on my back in a bit more noticable then I'd like it to be), I feel like need more support now -- both front and back.

The two-back claps are just not cutting it anymore. I think I'd prefer the support of 3 claps. (I feel like I'm beginning to sound soooo middle aged.).

And I'm tired of beige. Not that I was wild with color before, but there were options. There was lace. There was shades of blue. There was black.

And I have the $70 gift certificate to Victoria Secret that I got for my bachelorette party. Except I never used to shop there because I never thought their bras are comfortable and offer enough support. They seemed more for show than for support. And based on the media reports this week, it seems that I was not the only one thinking so about Victoria Secret.

Still, I have $70 to burn. I may as well figure out what they're offering.